Proud White Mama of My Beautiful Black Son

I'm a pale-skinned freckle-faced red head. (In other words, I'm about as white as you can get.) I grew up in small town America where almost everyone else was white like me. And I will be the first to admit that, though I'm seeking to learn, I don't fully "get" what it's like to be black in America.

I don't know what it's like to be judged unfairly, hated by some, misunderstood and mistreated simply because of the color of my skin. I don't know what it's like to walk around with the knowledge that some people assume I'm violent or poor or less than or uneducated or unintelligent simply because of my skin color. I don't know what it's like to experience the evil of racism first hand. I don't know what it's like because I'm white.

But I do know what it's like to be the mommy of a beautiful black baby boy.

I know what it's like to look at his beautiful brown skin and feel his warm hand in mine and wonder if my heart might burst right out of my chest with love.

I know what it's like to hold him in my arms and tell him that his skin is beautiful, that God made him black for His glory, that he is made in the image of God.

I know what it's like to sit down with my four children, watching Dr. Martin Luther King's "I Have A Dream" speech, tears streaming down my face in awe at the miracle that my family gets to look like this.

Though there are many things I don't know, there is one thing I know for sure; I know that being the white, pale-skinned mommy of my beautiful black baby boy is one of the greatest joys of my life.

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About The Kids

I'm not too concerned about what everyone in the world thinks about my blog, but I do have one reader who I especially want to enjoy my posts. It's one who adores this blog and begs to read each post over and over and over again. Nope. It's not my husband. It's my sweet 7 year old! But to be honest, she's not been too impressed lately. "Mom, I still like it. But I miss you doing more stuff about us. You know?! About your kids!" And so, without further adieu, for my sweetie little bookworm, I present to you a "kid" post.

The Joyful 16 Month Old

Loves: Dancing, laughing, smiling, giving hugs, books, throwing balls, wearing/taking off hats, bananas, baths, getting into everything, chucking toys into the toilet, and climbing on top of anything and everything. 

The Little Sweetie 4 Year Old

Loves: giggling, looking at books, snuggling Mommy, playing with her baby dolls, chasing Titus, dancing, school, Doc McStuffins, yogurt, being read to by Tali, playing Legos with Owen, smiling.

The Energetic 6 Year Old Drummer Boy

Loves: drumming, sushi, Legos, sword fighting with Titus, playing with his sisters, Star Wars, Ninjago, reading the Bible with Mom or Dad, music, animals, hot sauce, football with Dad.

The Sweet and Helpful 7 Year Old Bookworm

Loves: reading, sewing, fairies, playing piano, Heidi, time with Grandma, American Girl Dolls, Star Wars, playing Barbies with Addie, reading to Owen, helping with Titus, the library, sugar, Fridays with Daddy, reading with Mommy, singing.

There you go, Sweet Girl! I hope that you enjoyed finally seeing another post about each of you cute kids.

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Is Our Family Too Big To Adopt?

There are many fears and falsehoods out there about adoption such as: "I could never afford to adopt," "Is there really a need in the U.S.," "Birthmoms are scary," "My spouse will never agree," "Can I really love a child I didn't give birth to," "Do I really have what it takes," and "I'm too old." Today, I want to share about another falsehood that hinders people from adopting. It's this assumption: Our family is too big to adopt.

Can a "large" family adopt domestically? Yes! But the requirements for adoptive families vary from agency to agency. Some agencies do not let families with a certain amount of children adopt through them. But not every adoption agency works that way. If you've been told by an agency that you have too many children to pursue adoption, don't let that stop you from continuing to learn more.

It makes me so sad when I run across a family that says, "We wanted to adopt but were told by the agency we couldn't because of our family size." Not every agency has those specific perimeters! It is indeed possible for a "large" family to adopt domestically if you find the right agencies. Especially with a multi-agency approach, an adoption consultant can point you to multiple agencies and attorneys across the United States who are happy to work with "larger" families.

That may lead you to ask another question: do expectant mothers ever choose a larger adoptive family? Every expectant mom is different and so each will differ in the hopes and preferences she has for the family that will adopt her child. Some expectant moms don't prefer to place their baby in a home with any children at all, some want a home with only one or two kids, and some are not at all deterred by large families. In fact, some expectant moms specifically desire a larger family.

If God has given you a desire to adopt, please don't let the idea that your family is "too large" stand in your way! I recently had a family with seven children chosen by the very first expectant mama that they presented their profile book to. If God wants your family to bring home a child through the gift of adoption, He is able to bring that about.

For more information about domestic adoption, please contact me!

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