(Photo by Nathan Anderson on Unsplash)
What do you do when adoption heartbreak envelops you at Christmastime? Whether you find yourself in an unexpected ongoing season of empty arms, are walking through a prolonged wait, or have experienced an adoption that didn't work out the way you hoped, Christmastime can magnify the sting of suffering. Whatever was already hurting seems to hurt more in a season that presents itself as "merry" and "bright," especially when you feel the opposite.
If that's the difficult path you're currently on, pretend with me for a moment that we're sitting down together with hot drinks, ignoring the hustle and bustle around us, and you've just shared with me the heavy weight on your heart. In this moment, where it's clear that no words can really make this all better, I want to compassionately point you to the God of all comfort. Scripture calls Him, "the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction..." (2 Corinthians 1:3). Mercy. Comfort. That's what He offers you this season and what He offers is so very different than what the rest of the world does.
Well-meaning people may attempt to help but leave you feeling more isolated and more hurt. Even a spouse who wants to understand can't fully grasp what it's like for you to uniquely process these challenging circumstances. But the Father of mercies and God of all comfort knows your heart. He knows your pain. He sees and He knows and He is right here with you, wanting to comfort you in all your affliction. The Father of mercies and God of all comfort isn't frowning at you, telling you to get it together and be happy this Christmas. He isn't expecting you to pretend everything is fine or ignore that this isn't how it's supposed to be. He is telling you that He is with you and that He is your comforter.
In Isaiah 41:10 we hear God's heart for us: "fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Even now, He is ready to help you and with you. He is with you, upholding you.
This Christmas, let's remember that Jesus came and entered our world as a baby in Bethlehem. He came into the darkness of sin and suffering as the Light of the World. That baby took on flesh, grew up, and paid the price for our sins on the cross. In our desperation and sadness, He made way for hope; He gave us the promise that we can be made right with God, and one day, He will wipe away every tear from our eyes as we see Him face to face. He carried our griefs and sorrows. By His wounds we are healed (Isaiah 53). There will come a day when all things will be made new and the brokenness and sorrow of this world will be a distant memory as we spend forever in eternity with no more sorrow, no more tears.
But until that day, while you stumble brokenhearted through this Christmas season, look to your Father of mercies. He is the God of all comfort. He is with you.
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