Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Somewhere Tonight

Somewhere tonight, she is there.  I don't know her name.  I don't know what has brought her to this place.   I don't know what she looks like or what her background is or what makes her laugh or what her dreams for this baby are.  But I know that she's out there.  She might be scared.  She might be confused.  She might feel alone or angry or completely unsure of where to go or what to do.  Maybe she's not sure if she can continue with this pregnancy.  Maybe she's trying to just ignore the life inside of her.  Maybe she has been abandoned, forsaken, kicked out and without a place to go because of this baby.  Maybe she feels like all hope for her future has ended.  

Maybe she's considering ending this life or maybe she wants so badly to keep this baby.  Maybe she is doing all she can to feed the mouths of the little ones she already has and knows she can't add another.  Maybe she has a supportive OB or maybe she's never seen a doctor because she doesn't have insurance.  Maybe she has a husband who's standing by her through this decision or maybe she has a boyfriend who has left her when he heard or maybe she doesn't even know who this baby's father is.  Maybe she's a teenager or maybe she's a woman or maybe she's somewhere in between.
I've never met her.  In truth, I know virtually nothing about her.  Still, I lay awake at night thinking of her, praying for her, crying for her. I know that she is an amazing person because choosing to go through nine months of pregnancy knowing you will not be there for the first smile, first steps, first words, first everything is grief unimaginable.  She is brave and she is making an incredibly selfless choice. Again and again, I'm asking God to bring her to someone who will stand by her through this, someone to show her the love of a God who does not let go...someone who will show her Jesus.

Somewhere tonight, she is there.  We don't know her name.  We don't know what has brought her to this place but we know that she's out there. Whatever differences she and I may have, what we've got in common cannot be measured.  We both want what's best for this baby and our lives will never be the same because of this child.

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4 Responses to “Somewhere Tonight”

  1. Oh, Katie. Heart-rending words, beautifully expressed.

  2. Can't help but think on how our Heavenly Father knows all too well what she is going through in giving up her child. To think that He gave up His ONLY Son - not for His sake but for OURS makes me consider the act of adoption out of this world amazing.

    Praying with you - emphatically and empathetically.

  3. lovely. sad and hopeful and lovely.

  4. Katie....I cried through this post...you see, I was this girl once. Young, alone, and pregnant. Fearful of the future, and wondering if life will ever be good again. Though in my situation, I kept my baby, I know there are many mommies out there who will choose to give their baby up in hopes of giving him or her a better life. Whoever this mommy may be, she has no idea the blessing you and josh will be to her precious baby.....