Monday, August 6, 2012

Matched: Two Not One

It's so difficult to find the words to share this beautiful, surprising update on our adoption story.  In all honesty, it still feels surreal to us.  When you've waited and prayed for years for something and then suddenly you find yourselves waking up not needing to ask for that same request's really just hard to process.

We are delighted and amazed to announce that we've been matched with an expectant mom due in December with...get this...twins!  Yes; the very thing we've been hoping and praying for.  We can't believe that this is really happening!  Here are some of the events of the past week:

Thursday:  I got an email from our adoption consultant about a twins situation that needed families to show their profiles for and I immediately got this nervous/excited, "Oh my goodness, this could be it!" kind of feeling in my stomach.  I called Josh but couldn't get ahold of him so I texted him.  Then I called him again.  Then I started texting multiple people who I thought might be with him to tell them to have him call me.  (Sorry, everyone!)  Eventually, he realized he'd not been checking his phone and called me back.  It took about 2 minutes for us to decide that we wanted our profile shown and about 2 minutes to decide that we probably wouldn't be chosen.

Friday:  We wrote an additional letter to be included with our profile.  It specifically addressed our desire to have an on-going relationship with the birthparents of our little ones.  I emailed it to the attorney's office and heard that profiles would be shown on Monday.  That evening, I sent out an email asking people to pray for this expectant mom, especially that she'd have peace and that God would clearly direct her as she chose a family.  I wondered if it was ok to even hope...

Saturday:  We waited and prayed and enjoyed time with Josh's family.  We talked about how twins would be amazing but it was too far out of a chance; we didn't think there was any way that we'd be chosen.

Sunday:  We waited and prayed some more and enjoyed more time with family.  Many others prayed for this expectant mom, too.

Monday:  We heard that profiles wouldn't be shown until Tuesday.  (More praying and waiting.)

Tuesday:  I woke up in the morning and thought, "What if we aren't chosen?!"  Josh woke up and thought, "What if we're chosen and we have twins?!"  We laughed and talked about how we'd just have to wait and see, but it wasn't very likely that we'd be picked.  We went to the Children's Museum and all that I could think about was that a very real very pregnant woman had our profile in her hands and was making one of the biggest decisions of her life.  Tracie texted to let me know that the birthmom was taking the decision very seriously and we wouldn't hear back that day.  (More waiting and praying.)
(Mesmerized by the trains at the museum.)
Wednesday:  I swayed between feeling completely despairing that we for sure would not be chosen for the twins, and having a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe she'd choose us.

Thursday:  We'd still heard nothing.  Josh said, "I think we probably have about a 10% chance of being chosen."  I felt depressed and figured we'd hear later that day that we weren't chosen.  I emailed Tracie and asked her if she'd heard anything.  About 5 minutes later she called me back.  I assumed she was calling in response to my email, to break the news to me that we weren't chosen.

I pick up the phone and there was something different in her voice...,"Katie?  Katie?"  Then our reception got spotty and the cell phone died.  My heart was racing and I started thinking that maybe this was the call we'd been waiting for.  There was just something about the way that Tracie said my name that made me wonder.

I ran down the stairs and yelled out to Josh (who was waiting in the van for me to head to the sprinkler park) to get inside fast.  I picked up the phone again as Tracie called back and she said, "Katie?  Katie?  She chose you.  She chose you!"  I hugged Josh and screamed and heard more details.  We were in complete shock.  We really did not think that we were going to be chosen.  And just like that, we were!

We headed to the sprinkler park, called some family and friends, and walked around with crazy huge smiles on our faces.
(Splash Pad fun with cousin Eli!)
Later that afternoon, I spoke with the attorney's office and later that night I had our first conversation ever with our expectant mom (who is, by the way, absolutely incredible!).  Afterwords, I hung up the phone stunned as she texted us ultrasound pictures of the babies.  Twins!  Two little beautiful babies.
(Here's one of the little guys!)
There's much more I could write about how adoption's never certain until after the babies are born or about how we honestly don't know for sure if this birthmom will go ahead with the adoption in December.  I could write about how much I love our birthmom already or about how thankful Josh and I are that God so specifically answered so many of our prayers.  I could write about how we're telling our kids and ourselves that we have an incredible opportunity to love and care for this expectant mom regardless of what happens after the twins are born.  I could write paragraphs about how breathtaking all of this really is but not today.  Today, I'm just leaving it at this: we're matched.  And Lord willing, we're not just expecting one baby in December; we're expecting twin boys!

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